Dreamweaver - PHP: I'm loving it!

I feel like a giddy fan boy.

I resisted using Dreamweaver for some reason.  The only help I really need is an editor which will color code some components of the language.  Make the comments chartreuse, key words blue, character strings purple, etc. and I'm satisfied.

It only took a brief exposure to Dreamweaver whining that I hadn't closed an open quote - Hey!  I'm not finished typing - that I realized the real power of the application.

Just that nagging is enough to get me to do what I usually do, but more consistently.  In my configuration Dreamweaver puts a red bar in the margin when there it detects an error on a line.  This means that if I start to type a quoted string, I will see the red bar within a few seconds of typing a quoted string unless I have already typed the closing string.  Good practice is to start writing the quoted string by typing the opening quote, then the closing quote, and then filling in the actual text.

Is is so affirming to not see the red bar that I've found myself coding more carefully.  And of course the predictive features where potential variables are listed in a popup makes it even easier.

And PHP?  Ask and the documentation returns clear explanations and easily understood examples.  What's not to love?

Contrast that with Python's documentation.  Language boosters hurl invectives at any perceived slight of their one true language.  I do not want to do anything like that here.  If I spent the time to study Python I'm sure it would take less than a week for me to speak rapturously of Python's glories, but I would still whine about the official documentation.

For years I've told students how much better their technology is than the stuff we learned on.  Unfortunately it now means that instructors can demand more from their students  (Students rarely win.  Just recently I saw a student turning in a hand drawn graph.  When I asked him why he didn't - I didn't get a chance to finished the sentence before the student answered that that the instructor wanted it hand drawn.  I can understand that.  Hand plotting gave me a feel for data.  But after doing several, why not give the kids a break?)

I on the other hand am just enjoying writing in PHP because the documentation has clear examples and, because I haven't yet run up against the limitations of the language, loving it.

Coding is fun once again.

Passives, Pandas, and Dangling Modifiers

This is about a post, "Passives, Pandas, and Dangling Modifiers", to the The Chronicle of Higher Education Lingua Franca blog discussing a mistake about the passive voice and dangling modifiers.  The post contains a joke told by presenter Sandi Toksvig, presenter of a Radio 4 comedy news program:

“Though overweight, uninterested in sex, and notorious for their very poor diet,” she said, pausing for exactly the right fraction of a second while we took this in, “they were still very glad to see the pandas arrive.”

I originally thought the "they" would be the Scottish Conservative party, but it was actually the Scots themselves.

Kuduro

Kuduro is a type of African music I first saw mentioned in an interview with a tailor originally from South Africa.  Figuring that youtube would be be the best place to look I came across a video which featured a number of stunning dance/acrobatic moves.  (As I write this I suspect that the "stunning dance/acrobatic move" may be just ho-hum ordinary for those in the know about the culture, but just new to me.)

About 1:23 seconds into "Buraka Som Sistema - Sound of Kudur"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4CkXhtw7UNk a young man takes a step, seems to kick one leg out from under him with the other leg and taking a silent screen worth prat fall twirling his legs as his body spins in mid air so that he lands face forward.  (Looking at the sequence over and over the timing varies from 1:23-1:28 minutes into the video.)

While one part of my mind is marveling at their physical ability another part is wondering about monetizing their skill.  After watching the sequence over and over a more accurate description is that he seems to be executing a weird low level pole vault where he walked past the bar, and then threw himself backwards over it.

The price of spending an eternity as a moth

Starting from "'It' Girls Work Both Sides of the Camera" in the Thursday Styles section of the February 16^th 2012 NY Times about fashion models taking up the camera I learned about web sites/blogs streetfaces (part of Flickr), Face Hunter, Sartorialist (actually TheSartorialist) and took to the web to see for myself.

One of the first pieces of advice a novice photographer gets is to determine the point of interest.  With people, that generally means getting in close.  Looking at these fashion sites, I was struck by the fact that most of the photos are full length shots and the photos do not have the "Instamatic look" of amateur photos. 

Duh, well the photographers know what they're doing. Perhaps it's just that the subjects aren't full face facing the camera with their hands rigidly by their site, a corpse propped upright.

 For some reason this image (http://www.thesartorialist.com/photos/on-the-street-most-chic-paris/) caught my eye.  I didn't find the person or the style particularly appealing, but the comments drew my attention, especially this response to a previous comment:

Do I detect a twist of envy in some of these comments? From a Buddhist perspective, I would gladly pay the price of spending an eternity as a moth for the pleasure of being reincarnated as her boyfriend, even if just for a day. ~ j. crisp October 22, 2007 at 12:11 pm

While most comments related to the fashion I was surprised that one photo (I can no longer locate) of a young woman on a bicycle in London drew considerable criticism because she was riding without a helmet.

Worried the Kardashians are giving trash a bad rep?

Thrillists subject line was "Kickflip These Onto Your Face", but their lead, quoted above, was clever I thought: the email promoted JackThreads's salvaged wood frame eye glasses.

Recyclers should appropriate the phrase for their own use: "Giving trash a good name".

The Queens SK8 with "vintage ebonised arms" and special hinges for a "highly satisfying skull grab" is shown below.

I remember a snippet of a Sanford and Son episode where Red Foxx, playing the older Sanford dismisses the stuff in the back of his son's truck with, "This stuff gives garbage a bad name."  (Maybe it was trash getting a bad name, but you get the idea.)

Body Double for Video

I stumbled over Roger Penwill, a cartoonist who has some CAD and computer related cartoons www.penwill.com/ and (http://www.cadcartoons.com/cadcartoons_cartoons.html).  I'm not sure If I'm violating the terms of service by linking to an image on his site.

This cartoon displays raises the level of deception far above removing zips from images posted to a dating site.

More Quotes, Turns of Phrase, and Jokes

" I knew that the actual objectives of war were always camouflaged by well-designed lies that exploit collective fear and perpetuate national myths." -  by SINAN ANTOON "Fifteen Years Ago, America Destroyed My Country" https://www.nytimes.com/2018/03/19/opinion/iraq-war-anniversary-.html

"... Canonical is still committed to pushing envelopes others are only now learning to lick and fold." From http://www.techrepublic.com/blog/10things/10-things-the-linux-desktop-can-be-proud-of/3093.

She: I want to get drunk and do something stupid.
He: I'm something stupid.  Do me.

Paraphrased and stolen from Prairie Home Companion:

• What he took for a gleam in her eye was only her special contacts.
• Marriage is like bridge: you start with a heart and a diamond and end with a club and a spade.
• If the going gets tough look for the nearest exit.
• Multi-tasking means reading on the toilet.
• The difference between death an marriage is that when you're dead you don't wish you were married.
• A paranoid schizophrenic though he was following someone
• Did you hear about the paranoid schizophrenic? He always thought he was following someone.
  

From Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me:  Rick Santorum has nothing to boast about.  Caligula's horse was also a senator.

From http://www.jokesplace.com/joke/mentalhealth.html:

• If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. 
• If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.  
• If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
• If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

From Car Talk: The difference between death and marriage: When you're dead ...

"the only consolation I can receive"

Vatican secret archive opened in EMC-sponsored exhibition

From yesterday's ComputerWorld:

EMC said its sponsorship was part of its Information Heritage initiative, in which it has been digitizing historic documents and making them publicly available.

The letter by Marie Antoinette is thought to have been addressed to Louis XVI's brother Charles Philippe, Count of Artois, who in 1824 became Charles X, King of France.
The letter, which is only 10 lines in length, reads, "The sentiments of those who share my pain, my dear brother-in-law, are the only consolation I can receive in this sad circumstance." The letter is then signed, "Your loving Sister-in-Law and Cousin Marie Antoinette.

Sentiments being the only consolation is universal. What can others do about our sorrow? (If this were the 60's drugs would be answer proffered for any situation.)

A Cold Call

A few days ago I received a call at the office. A female voice asked me if I remembered our previous conversation. "No.", I said. "I have no recollection of ever talking to a female stock broker."

It's true. She went on to relate the date she called, her recommendation, and some personal information intended to convince me of her veracity, probably the first car I drove. (In her sales training they probably use the word "truth" instead of "veracity", but that's the way I speak.  Also, I usually lie about the car,  claiming to drive a much cooler car than I ever drove and because that information is frequently used online to establish identity. )  Would it be possible to pass along contact information from one broker to another?

"Go ahead." I said,  "Do your stuff."

"Stuff?"

"Your sales pitch."

She didn't get all huffy, but, like the pro she was, she asked, "Are you familiar with ARM Holdings, ARMH?"

I said I didn't, but just as soon as she started to explain why she thought I would make a killing because Apple was rumored to want to buy the company I interrupted. (A bad personal habit, but beating someone to the punch line to jokes is a blood sport around here.)

"Oh the ARM processor?  Yeah it's in cell phones, netbooks, and ..." I went on a bit and then asked her if she knew what percentage of Apple's income came from cell phones.

She didn't know.  (I've got a small 3-ring binder with sales calls scripts.  Scenarios where the mark has fun with the caller isn't covered.)

Only a few days before I remember seeing a pie chart of Apple's income sources (http://www.zdnet.com/blog/bott/microsoft-apple-and-google-where-does-the-money-come-from/4469).  I spent a few minutes giving her the benefit of my minimal analysis of Apple's finances and the limitations of the ARM processor.

 

Anyway she wanted to establish a relationship right there and then.  I suggested that she trust in the Postal Service.  (I was once advised to have those things sent via the Postal Service instead of FedEx because sending fraudulent material through the Postal Service is a federal offense.)

I'm waiting.

Andrew Breitbart Dies at 43

My first thought when I saw the headline yesterday was "How nice."  Reading that he had a wife and 4 children only made me wonder if he'd bought enough life insurance.

Charles Krautheimer said, "And you know when people die, you say they are irreplaceable as a cliche. But I think in this case, it's true."  (http://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2012/03/01/krauthammer_breitbart_is_irreplaceable.html)  Let's hope he's correct.

There was an obituary some years ago about a guy who'd worked on Wall Street, been convicted of some financial malfeasance, and then spent the rest of his life after prison working with the poor, people with AIDS, and the homeless.  The obit had a quote from former New York City mayor Ed Koch saying that the guy had nothing to apologize for.  The same could not be said about Breitbart.

Contrary to those who would comfort me with expectation of Breitbart's retribution in the afterlife, he went too quickly for the pain he caused.

Captain Travis Patriquin

I'd jotted a note to myself on an envelope: "Travis Patrick Quinn".   "XYZ Affair" was also written on the envelope.

A quick web search brought up:
http://smallwarsjournal.com/blog/a-tribute-to-captain-travis-patriquin.  The Leonard Lopate interview with William Doyle, author of "A Soldier's Dream: Captain Travis Patriquin and the Awakening of Iraq"   came flooding back along with Patriquin's famous stick figure PowerPoint presentation: "How to Win in Al Anbar.

 

The "XYZ Affair" was a 1798 incident in the administration of John Adams in which French representatives made unreasonable demands of the United States representatives.  War was narrowly averted, although there were two years in which the nascent American navy captured a number of French privateer vessels.

Patty Hearst at CES?

An email had a link to CES.  Following the link I was struck by the striking resemblance of the eye candy to Patty Hearst.  (For those too young to remember or too lazy to do a web search, Patty Hearst was the heiress to the Hearst fortune who was kidnapped  ("dragged naked and screaming") from her boyfriend's apartment by members of the Symbionese Liberation Army.  Go look up the rest.)

Here is the CES image:

and here are pictures of an older Patty Hearst:

More quotes

Blackmail is such an ugly word. Consider it coerced behavioral modification for the stubborn. - from "10 less-than-ethical ways to get ahead" by Alan Norton http://http://www.techrepublic.com/blog/10things/10-less-than-ethical-ways-to-get-ahead/2988

I found this scrawled on a business reply envelope to the World Wildlife Fund:
Christina Monet "Sleep It Off" might have been something I liked.  Below it there was a quote I haven't been able to place: "The wedding present was a horse named cocaine."  It might have been from Bernardo Bertolucci's 4-hour opus, 1900, at least that's what a web search turned up for "wedding present was a horse named cocaine".

Also on the envelope: "Consultant: self-unemployed"

This just in (2/7/2012) from a link from CodeProject ® some DBA jokes (http://www.codeproject.com/Lounge.aspx?msg=4147624#xx4147624xx):

"Give a man a mug, he drinks for a day. Teach a man to mug..."

"The difference between an ostrich and the average voter is where they stick their heads."

And from an article on "21^st Century Skills" in the March 2012 issue of Campus Technology: Our schools are still generally organized around answers rather than questions." Michael Wesch, Kansas State University.

Castalon Frying Pans or Looking the Gift Horse in the Mouth

Two Castalon frying pans were offered on a Freecycle site. I didn't recognize the brand.  A quick search of the web and well, well, a product recall.

The pans were made in China.  A meaningless observation or yet another indication that product from China should be suspect?

Howard Halpern & "The Other"

In his obit, a letter Howard Halpern wrote to the NY Times shortly after the Oklahoma City bombing in 1995 was quoted:

“we are unlikely to harm a friendly neighbor because she has strong views about equal rights for women, but if we call her a ‘femi-Nazi,’ she becomes ‘the other’ — evil, dangerous, hated.”

I'll remember this the next time someone uses a similar term.  I doubt it will have much effect, though it may throw someone off their stride to have someone else tell them that their choice of terms is to consciously paint someone they don't like as the other. 

It seemed to work in the short term for the Nazis against Jews and gypsies, Idi Amin against ethnic Indians, Hutu Power Hutus describing the Tutsi as cockroaches (and those of their own who wanted co-existence as traitors), and any Balkin ethnic group of your choice.

How would it be phrased?  "Are you trying to paint them as one of Howard Halpern's 'Others'?"  Would there be a pause for an explanation? 

Raindance Imperial 600 Air Showerhead

A link lead to a site on  money.MSN for items which are illegal to sell in the United States.  Besides Cuban cigars I learned that showerheads in America have been legally constrained from delivering more than 2.5 gallons of water per minute since 1992.

I haven't investigated whether that means that shower heads which exceed that limit can't be manufactured, imported, sold, installed, or used. There's a big difference especially because the Hansgrohe Raindance Imperial 600 Air Showerhead (the "28403001" to the cognoscenti) currently offered for $3,383.34 at homeclick.com, (in stock and "will ship in 24 to 48 hours").

At that price someone might want to buy the 28403001 as outre sculpture.

I don't remember this generating howls of protest against government regulation, but what with the New Hampshire primary just days away I look forward to this being part of a response to a question about specific regulations preventing America from assume it's rightful position in the world.

Bad Idea T-shirts

Bad Idea T-shirts provided a bit of joy this weekend. Our society has been criticized for getting its wisdom from bumper stickers and T-shirts. This post isn't going to help.  The graphics aren't particularly good, but I liked some of what I saw:

"Some people are like Slinkies: They aren't really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs."

What color does a Smurf turn when you choke it?

"DADD: Dads Against Daughters Dating - Shoot the first one and the word gets around"

Is this is a corollary to Dan Hedaya's line in Clueless? IMDB lists the quote as "Anything happens to my daughter, I got a .45 and a shovel, I doubt anybody would miss you." I prefer the way I remember it: "I've got a .45 and a shovel. I know how to use both."

And while stumbling through the quotes for Clueless I tripped over this exchange:
 
Cher: If it's a concussion, you have to keep her conscious, okay? Ask her questions.
Elton: What's seven times seven?
Cher: Stuff she knows.



When I sent a friend in western Virginia the "paddle faster" image he responded that it was a common bumper stickers around there.  It made him nervous.

One-of-a-kind Excursions

A link from ThrillList lead me to Excursionist™which promises "Travel tailored to your passions".

There's a lure for some, but not for me.  While others dream of schussing down remote peaks, horseback safaris, going on archeological disks, I still fantasize that someday I'll have enough time to read the NY Times every day and make headway against my to-read list.

Camel adventures in the Sahara, Holi in Jaipur, dog sledding in Norway, and on.  It's got to be my sour outlook that squashed the appeal of travel.  The fill-in parts of traveling - making reservations, arrangements, waiting here and waiting there, the parts that are not in the snapshots - seem so off putting.

I love to hear about my brother's experiences, climbing rickety stairs to the best noodle shop in Dam Ca Na or consulting on new restaurants in Japan, or my former kennel boy explaining the difficulty of bus travel in Java and the wilting heat on the Arabian peninsula - all great stories, to hear, but not something I want to do.

For those who still have money and need something to talk about it should be great.  I'm content to read about it in the times.

Oh, just remembered: the only time I felt a strong need to travel was way back when I was a freshman in college.  It was a speech class, a guy in Air Force ROTC was giving a talk about the wonders of Bermuda, with pink sandy beaches, warm tropical breezes, and crystal clear water.  He had a travel posted taped to the wall.  Outside the wind was howling, lashing snow against the windows.  Yeah, I wanted to be in Bermuda. 
The feeling has past.

Do Not Wash or Play

I picked up a hat on the street today which has unique care instructions.  (The white line is an artifact of the office scanner.)

What happens if the hat is washed?  Can parents be charged with endangering the welfare of child if the child starts waving the hat around?  Should I destroy the hat lest it fall into the wrong hands?

Life used to be so simple.

I emailed this along to a friend who surprised me with a reply which was more thoughtful than the message:

Perhaps we humans, or at least some of us, should have similar tags.  Those instructions would presumably be treated with the same respect as the one on the cap  (to be honored in the breach thereof)

Do not abuse this person in any way
Do not hurt this person.
Not a toy
Wash gently in warm water

Harry  (whose tag apparently got ripped off early in life, perhaps as collateral damage during a ritual cutting performed on most males in our culture)

Swapping Sylvester Stallone's Mother for David Beckham

In the course of his interview with On the Media Paul McMullan, a News of the World reporter, mentioned swapping Sylvester Stallone's mother phone number for David Beckham's. His point very simply was that he was giving the public what they wanted.

If the public didn't buy what the papers pandered the paper wouldn't shovel it. Drug dealers use the same rationale.

Paul McMullan gained notoriety as the journalist, who, after being tipped off by a cop, about Jennifer Elliot (Denholm Elliot's daughter) desperate search for drugs, persuaded her to pose topless. With the unerring logic of humiliation Jennifer Elliot eventually committed suicide.  The interview is worth a listen.